don't fight the feelin'

without exaggeration i get a headache about once a year, and today is the day and it's a pretty bad one. it's all rainy and gloomy outside and i got on my christmas lights inside to cheer me up. wonder what's going on... i like very much reading eastern philosophy. i could take the time to contemplate and philosphize about why do i have a headache, why the rainfall which i normally love seems gloomy today, and why i've reached for the soothing glow of soft white christmas lights...

but naaah. i won't fight the feeling this time. i'll just let it be. i'll just be...

been blue...

...been a little sad lately and it's been incredibly difficult to write. after some time passed i realised that i was 'blocked.' i guess writer's block is not a cliche. i tried a few things to try to get the juices running, but to no avail. and then on top of it i managed to get a kind of stomach bug, so i haven't been feeling well in general. i'm wondering if the sadness and stress has bought on sickness. i wouldn't be surprised, mind and body connection, you know? i tried to will myself better, but then i wondered if that was bringing on even more stress. not allowing myself to be. so i thought better of it, and gave in if you will. i just thought that i would let go...

... and i slept, and dreamed, and had tea, and listened to lovely music and i am reading novels and magazines, just spoiling myself really and i think it is helping. i feel like i'm starting to feel better, at least my little stomach bug seems to be flying away.

l'exercise

once around the block... this is advice i read for one wanting to begin to exercise. i thought this recomendation was ridiculous. what good can come from running or walking once around the block? the writer said that it is a beginning. a lame one at that, i thought, but it is indeed more than what i was doing. that winter morning i put on my jacket and hat as well as my sneaks and walked out into the brisk air. it was no fun, but i thought i should at least give it a chance. given a chance it does get to you, you start craving it. now i excercise for an hour at least four days a week. ...just once around the block. see what happens...